The 4 July general election heralded a true Monty Python moment – “and now for something completely different” – as I voted Labour for the first time in my life.
Are some in the Conservative party really ‘batshit’?
As a former Tory voter, member of the Conservative party, and borough councillor, I still had some unfinished business. I was exhausted – relieved, yet perplexed. Pinching an alleged description from the former Home Secretary, James Cleverley (the most unfortunately named politician ever) when privately describing the now defunct Rwanda Bill, how had the Tory party mutated into some kind of batshit brigade?
Codifying this position into a list of questions, I embarked on a personal quest to ease the anger I still felt and that ultimately shaped my decision to vote Labour for the first time ever.
After a few false leads, I sat down with a member of the party who possessed several impressive credentials and who was previously at the heart of a former Tory administration, is an impressive orator, and has a willingness to combine candour with conviviality. It was my decision to anonymise them since I wanted to engage in a ‘gloves-off’ exchange.
When did the rot set in?
Outlining my previous political heritage, I touted my hitherto loyalty as being connected with the once sensible centrist governance. Then I punched through any cordiality – when did the rot really set in?
The spasm of laughter didn’t disguise the fact that ‘rot’ caused alarm with my host. “A large chunk of the Conservative party wouldn’t agree with that observation, but I understand why you say it,” my companion responded. True-blue then mapped out a timeline from the 70s to early 1997 when, in their opinion, the Conservative party was – as it laughably tries to suggest nowadays – a broad church, with Thatcherism as the chief driving force. Then Tony Blair spooked the Tories into looking for their own ‘new’ branding.
A barnstorming speech by David Cameron – by dint of not referring to any notes – at the 2005 Tory party conference left heir apparent David Davis to scuttle away in humiliating defeat. However, according to my guest, Cameron was never a true Tory. More a social democrat with a fumbling grasp on the concept of political leadership and completely out of touch with most of the electorate. He wasn’t the messiah, or a very naughty boy – just all surface polish with little or no substance.
A Conservative lurch to the right and Brexit angst
Nonetheless, even with this scathing synopsis of the soon-to-be-crowned premier, the party fabric, according to my interviewee, remained intact. Asserting that “the true Tory principles – small state, low taxation, personal responsibility, and freedom – have always existed, but haven’t been articulated particularly well,” I challenged my sparring partner’s claim. I was puzzled with the seemingly fragile nature of this proclaimed constitution that had been missing in action as the party lurched towards the extreme right, trying to out-Farage Farage. I, too, was challenged to provide evidence of this statement. I had many exhibits at my disposal, albeit Brexit and the previously referenced Rwanda Bill were top of the list.
“The angst over Brexit hasn’t gone away and I was in two minds about which way to vote.” A lively exchange on this often-divisive topic ensued, with my opposite number disclosing the key factors in deciding to vote leave: unaudited EU accounts and the need to reform the institution. According to Full Fact, auditors say the accounts have been accurate since 2007. But they have historically recorded notable errors in how money is paid since their first audit in 1995. In the most recent year, they found a significant part of the EU’s spending was largely error-free for the first time.
Not a conclusive rubbishing of the EU’s book-keeping, but I had to acknowledge that it left an unpleasant odour. Interestingly, Tory bod’s favoured position was a super-majority referendum that would have given a voice to those who sought a reset in our relationship with our EU partners. A wonderful compromise that would have – ironically – been a win-win for all. Cameron’s weak leadership gave no room for this sensible solution and the rest, as they say, is history.
Rwanda and a case of dry rot
The defence of the Rwanda Bill was more robust with examples of other countries who had or were in the process of outsourcing asylum claims (e.g. Italy, Germany, and the Netherlands). Before exiting the EU, and latterly the dog’s dinner of Boris Johnson’s ‘oven ready BREXIT deal,’ the UK had, by reason of the Dublin Regulation, the power to return some asylum seekers to the member state determined to be responsible for handling an asylum claim. The critical – and in my opinion obscene – construction of the Rwanda Bill excluded the legitimate protection of valid asylum claims and would leave those poor souls marooned in Rwanda. The fact that the overwhelming number of claims are validated was silenced by the dog-whistle politics of Farage and, amongst others, the former deputy chair of the Conservative party, Lee Anderson MP.
Returning to my primary assertion, the loyal blue refused to accept that the party had a bad case of dry rot, but graciously listed several less-than-alluring characteristics: division, lack of leadership, incompetence, cronyism and Partygate.
The Johnson question
My next poser sought to shine a light on the central character of this concluding caustic criticism – how the hell did Johnson end up pulling the levers of power?
“Boris Johnson is a fascinating politician who, whether you like it or not, has the X-factor, enabling him to communicate with people across the political spectrum,” my interviewee declared. Nailing my colours to the mast, I didn’t like it. Sure, he presided over the biggest parliamentary majority since 1987, but his electoral kryptonite was the ability to lie convincingly, with whoppers so large that they needed the side of a bus to display them. Even my political peer gave some ground on this: “He is amoral, and I do not believe him to be a Conservative. He just believes in Boris.”
Johnson ended up with his hand on the tiller owing to the disastrous legacy of former leader William Hague, who handed supreme power to the Tory membership. “No political party should give the choice of its leader to its membership. That should be left to those who understand the parliamentary party – MPs,” my respondent asserted. Accepting that the membership had been utterly mesmerised by his supposed ‘X-factor’ the writing was on the wall for the chaos that followed. “The parliamentary party knew there would be an outcry if they didn’t put him forward. In the public affairs arena, I always maintained that Boris would be a brilliant leader of the opposition but a terrible Prime Minister. But to coin a Cameron phrase, one can only conclude that the ‘swivel-eyed loons’ were victorious.”
What next? The leadership race
So, what next for the Tory party and will they ever occupy the centre ground where I would consider voting for them again?
The solution offered by my companion was that “the challenge for the next leader of the party is to clearly demonstrate true Conservative principles. They must also simultaneously look both ways: to the challenge posed by Reform UK and the reality of why some traditional Conservatives lent their vote to Labour and the Liberal Democrats. The first past the post system – that the Tories have benefited from in the past – gave Labour a majority, but this is built on quicksand. I believe there is still a lot to be positive about and I can see green shoots all over the place.”
With the leadership frontrunners consisting of ‘Honest Bob’ Jenrick, ‘working class’ Kemi Badenoch (who once flipped burgers at MacDonalds), and Tom Tugendhat – playing to the audience of the swivel-eyed ones when he openly questions the UK’s membership of the ECHR that, if followed through, would align the country with such luminaries as Russia and Belarus – I am not so positive and the declaration on 2 November will, I suspect, be the continuity ticket that failed so miserably at the last election.
Our engaging political debate came to an end with the realisation that disarming disagreement is still possible in an environment that very often seeks to label people as either winners or losers. Lunch and a bottle of red wine were also persuasive.
But is the Tory party dead? Maybe not, and the positivity in its rebirth may be encapsulated within this immortal line, “No, no he’s not dead, he’s, he’s restin’! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn’it, ay? Beautiful plumage!”
